1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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