No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Edward fifth and chaser hands
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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