well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize