Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm bleeding and have questions
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
