i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
