I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
