Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize