the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
