would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
please come you make the beer taste better
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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