This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
