normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize