is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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