New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
