Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
you never un-have a 4some
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
