You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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