I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
