i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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