dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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