I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
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