Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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