youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
