I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
