thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
My dick has a subreddit
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
