Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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