i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
