I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
