Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
