She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
