idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Randomize
