I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
