Kiss
Puke
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
barbara walters just said penis...
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
