It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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