New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize