i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
