Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
