i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
