it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Randomize
