So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
