I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
