I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
