he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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