And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I need a burrito and a hug.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
