I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
