He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize