So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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