Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
