Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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