the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
