You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Quick, to the slutcave!
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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