He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i will never coherently bang her
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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